FROM WHERE I STAND | PERSONAL | EAST COAST WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER | ASHTON KELLEY PHOTOGRAPHY

From where I stand, I can see those miles ahead of me. I try to fast forward so I can catch up. I want to accomplish it all, too. I want to stand beside them. I ponder on my long drives from here and there why this or that hasn’t happened yet. I worry I’m not enough. I feel overwhelmed at how far behind I seem. I get defeated by it. It comes and goes.

I’m an ambitious person. There’s no denying that. If you’ve met me, you know how passionate I am about what I do. As this type of person, it’s easy to get caught up on where I’m going, how fast I can get there, and so much of that can be sparked by seeing what others around you are getting to do. I don’t think there’s a person in this industry who hasn’t been jealous of someone else’s career, or even just an opportunity they’ve had. Let’s be honest.

I have to stop myself sometimes. I have to really force myself to look back on the last four years and focus on where I, myself, have grown. Our beginnings are so important because they shape us into the artist we will become. They strengthen us, harden us, and still enable us to be ourselves in an industry that has made it ok to have a voice.. a personality. If nothing else, I am learning that it’s much easier to squash negative thoughts by reminding myself how lucky I am just to be doing something I love so incredibly much. Becoming a mentor this year and watching other creatives struggle through the motions has also made me value those steps and missteps that have led me here. Those moments were so crucial in making me the entreprenuer I am today.

I have to remember that from where I stand, there are people walking the same path. They lie both ahead and behind me. They struggle, they get back up to dust themselves off, and they are hustling. They are feeling the same ways that I am, and they are making a decision each and every day to keep going. We are in line, climbing that ever-growing ladder of success, but we are together. This reminds me that I am not alone and that from where I stand, it ain’t so bad. <3

“Have patience with all things, but first with yourself. Never confuse your mistakes with your value as a human being. You are a perfectly valuable, creative, worthwhile person simply because you exist and no amount of triumphs or tribulations can ever change that.” | St. Francis de Sales

– Ash